Ladies and gentleman, children of all ages, we are gathered here today to mourn the death of the nuclear family. Our finest television preachers and our sweatiest politicians spent decades warning us that we were headed this way. They decried music, drugs, and dancing, and we eradicated those things. But what they could not have known was that the true destruction of the familial unit was magic. Our children have turned to godless magic and now all is lost.
So today, brothers and sisters, we gather here to witness the fourth installment in What the Hell is Anime, and we examine where it all went wrong. Families up front, let your feet stomp to the spirituals.