Dark Knight Rises Trailer: Can Nolan Follow Up the Joker? Kinda Looks Like It

Compared to the last comic book movie trailer I posted (see: Ghost Rider 2: Spirit of Vengeance), the new Dark Knight Rises trailer looks like a ball of Citizen Kane wrapped in bacon-flavored whiskey. Both delicious, dangerously manly and on a fast track for critical acclaim. Of course, that’s not setting the bar particularly high.

So how does the Dark Knight Rises really look? Click on through to watch the trailer (probably again) and share your thoughts on my thoughts!

Dark Knight Rises Trailer Thoughts

• Bane looks bad ass. He’s got the whole “I am your nightmare” Hannibal Lecter mask going on, which is a great touch. The only problem I have is: will we be able to understand what he’s saying? Nolan is very clearly avoiding a thoughtless, Venom-ridden Bane, and instead making him just a beastly criminal mastermind. So I’m definitely going to want to know what he’s saying. There’s already a @MuffledBane twitter handle mocking what could become a running joke that takes away from an otherwise great film.

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• Broken Bat story is a fantastic choice (the broken bat helmet on the movie poster seems to imply this is definitely the direction of the film). So far Nolan’s gone with the psychologically devastating/agents of chaos. Combining some of that crime acumen with Bane’s unrivaled strength and you’ve got a howitzer of a final villain. One who can believably “break the bat” and force him to rise above his failure.

• Catwoman as the “we are the 99%” role makes a lot of sense. Remember, Frank Miller had her as a prostitute living in the slums of Gotham in Year One. She has that connection with the real people of Gotham that Bruce Wayne never really could. It makes sense that she would fill the robin hood “steal from the rich to feed… my fashion sense” kind of anti-hero. Anne Hathaway’s part in this movie was one of the aspects I was most dubious of, but this seems like a positive direction from Nolan.

• Can I just say what a freakin” commentary on America this seems to be! Nolan’s tapped into the Occupy Wall-Street angst, playing a creepy-ass Star Spangled Banner to open the trailer (creepiest kid voice since Social Network’s Creep), before blowing up a freaking football field. Not the stadium, the effing field the players are running on. WHAT AN ENCAPSULATION OF AMERICAN EXCESS! Is there a better example than the NFL? Holy Gluttony, Batman! Now I’m just terrified this will pull a Clancy and give bad people ideas.

• Hines Ward outrunning the exploding field is the most preposterous moment of any movie since Superman flew around the Earth to go back in time. Ward is old as cave painting. When was this scene cut, 2004? Even if this is a perfect movie otherwise, this cameo will bother me a little. Hines Ward? How the ballsack does he even get in this movie? Did he blow Nolan? Does he have footage of Nolan getting blow? I just need to know the precise manner of blowing that made this happen. That’s all I need.

Having said all that, I’m really excited for this film. I know I’m in the minority there. So, go ahead and watch the trailer below and share your thoughts in the comments? Is this film going to be awesome? Suck righteously? Do you know how Hines Ward got in this scene? Did it involve oral sex, blackmail, or all of the above? Share your thoughts!